News of the Tweet: Crossover and Crossed Wires
Snow blindness, fungal rapture, and tazers.
By Seb Kemp
This week, there seems to have been some crossover happening between various sports’ top athletes and with mixed results.
Danny Hart has been roaming around California signing posters, and baffling people with his gravel and guttural accent. Recently VitalMTB dragged Hart out to a sandpit with MX2 World Champion Ken Roczen for some laps on a noise maker and then some runs on DH bikes. Hart is a big MX rider so he did more than respectably well alongside a full-time fire breathing moto-rider, and when it came to switching roles Roczen impressed with how quickly he adapted to the lighter downhill bikes.
Then last weekend, in Colorado, there was some ridiculous competition where a select group of mountain biker freestylers went head-to-head trying to out aerial maneuver each other. Unfortunately, someone invited multiple X-Games gold medalist Chad Kagy to the party and he took home the top spot.
Sure, Chad Kagy is no flash in the pan and the skills of jumping a BMX over what amounts to a shark pit at the X-Games Big Air comp easily crosses over to jumping a slightly larger BMX over a giant jump in the snow, but isn’t it just a little bit embarrassing that some of freeride’s best jumpers couldn’t win their own comp?
As the mysterious Kevin Shiramizu put it, “[It is like] throwing a huge party, somehow get lots of ladies to attend, and then invite the Fonz to completely upstage everyone and steal all the vagina.”
Anyway, Chad Kagy is a monster and here is the moment he snapped his femur upon re-entry at last year’s X-Games Big Air comp.
Shaun Palmer is someone who is legendary for crossing over between sports and then stealing all the prize money, beer and pussy at any party he turned up to. However, one of his tweets at the weekend could be evidence that he has crossed over to the trippy world on the other side.
Perhaps it was such journeys through the Doors that lead to the invention of the next greatest crossover sport, Ultimate Tazer Ball.
Seamlessly blending police violence with thug violence, UFC with technology, and ball sports with men with little balls, UTB is possibly the greatest sporting invention since Street Luge or Snow Biking.
Please someone step in to help Duncan Riffle. I’d hate to see him fall into the weird world of competitive UTB to make ends meet.
Also, at the weekend there was a music entertainment crossover between the death of a legend and the death of decency. Chris Brown beat his way to a Grammy award and Whitney Houston was found dead in a bathtub.
Finally, Taylor Sage remains on his one-man mountain bike musical manifesto…
…and the boys at Orange are doing job crossovers this week and they ask the most pertinent question.