Author Archives: "Vernon Felton"

The Web Monkey Speaks: The Good Stuff

11.03.2014 //

In our meticulously-preserved Botox’d, chin-tucked, Hair Club for Men-ified world, you can be fooled into thinking getting older ain’t going to happen to you. You’re just a young buck stuck in amber. Timeless. Forever fit and full of piss and vinegar. Yeah, good luck with that…

Preview: RockShox Monarch Plus RC3 DebonAir

10.30.2014 //

RockShox’s answer to the question of how to achieve the perfect balance between small bump compliance and big-hit performance? They call it DebonAir. Here are some first ride impressions of the DebonAir-equipped Monarch Plus RC3 shock.

The Web Monkey Speaks: So, You Want An Affordable Bike?

10.27.2014 //

Last week we listed 10 of the Best Deals when it came to 2015 mountain bikes. Were those too rich for your blood? Okay, try these on for size.

Tested: Schwalbe Super Gravity Hans Dampf

10.23.2014 //

With the Hans Dampf Super Gravity, Schwalbe has mated a downhill casing to an all-mountain tread. You get super stout sidewalls that fend off gashes and punctures, and also enable you to run exceptionally low tire pressures. In short, gobs of traction, minimal squirm and bomber durability.

The Web Monkey Speaks: Ten of 2015’s Best Deals

10.19.2014 //

Mountain bikes don’t come cheap these days–that’s a sad truth. Here, however, are ten models that truly kick arse right out of the box and offer as much bang for your buck as some models that cost twice as much.

Tested: Specialized Mechanic’s Wrench Set

10.16.2014 //

I don’t like futzing with big, clumsy multi-tools. I’d rather have the right tool for the job. These are the right tools. They fit in my hydration pack. If I was sweating the extra weight, I’d go vegan or something.

The Web Monkey Speaks: The Urine Jug of Friendship

10.13.2014 //

You may never want to ever take a trip to Dudelandia. I understand, it smells and those jugs of urine are a serious tripping hazard—but there’s a lot to be said for finding a way to immerse yourself, even for just a day or two each year, in the thing you love with the people in your life that matter. Your time with friends is limited. Make the most of it.

Preview: Race Face Atlas Pedal

10.08.2014 //

Race Face’s Atlas pedals are wide, light, grippy and, by all appearances, pretty damn robust. Here are some first impressions of a very promising pedal.

The Web Monkey Speaks: P.S. I Hate You

10.06.2014 //

The world is full of inconsiderate, mouthing-breathing knuckle-draggers. And, yet, at the risk of sounding Pollyannaish, the world of cycling is marvelously jerk-free. Why is that, exactly?

Review: MRP AMg chainguide

10.02.2014 //

MRP’s AMg chain guide offers a twofer to anyone opting to go the 1X route: the upper guide keeps your chain from going AWOL on rocky descents and the integrated taco–style skid takes the brunt of your mis-timed encounters with things large and immovable.

The Web Monkey Speaks: Unwarranted trail maintenance

09.29.2014 //

When some wannabe Boy Scout decides to help the rest of us by making every trail mundane, he robs us of choice and degrades the mountain biking experience for everyone. Don’t dumb down our trails.

One-By on a budget, part 1

09.24.2014 //

Single-ring drivetrains offer some great benefits, but they can also cost a bundle. Here’s what I propose: a series of reviews centered on budget single-ring drivetrains. How much performance can you wring out of as inexpensive a set up as possible?

The Web Monkey Speaks: The ride is my church

09.22.2014 //

There are many ways to worship a higher power. I just have a hard time doing it in church.

Tested: Ellsworth Epiphany C XC & Epiphany 275 Enduro SST.2e

09.18.2014 //

Ellsworth’s Epiphany C XC and Epiphany Enduro sport nearly identical frames, suspension travel and components…and yet offer very different rides. Which bike is better?

The Web Monkey Speaks: Trail etiquette

09.15.2014 //

Your horse poops, leaves post holes in wet trails and has a tendency to panic. So, where’s the trail etiquette?

Tested: Troy Lee Designs A1 Drone

09.11.2014 //

Troy Lee Designs spent three years fine-tuning this helmet. That sounds ludicrous, until you strap it on. It’s not perfect, but the A1 is damn close.

The Web Monkey Speaks: Why is Interbike held in Las Vegas?

09.07.2014 //

Las Vegas is a lot of things, including the perfect place to shoot a grenade launcher, dabble with alcohol poisoning and begin your lifelong relationship with Herpes. Las Vegas, however, is not a cycling Mecca. So why does the bike industry keep holding its annual tradeshow there? Strangers still… Why do I love it?

Tested: Specialized Roval Traverse SL 29

09.04.2014 //

The Roval Traverse SL 29s are lighter than a set of wagon wheels have a right to be, they don’t feature crazy, proprietary components that require outlandish tools to fix, they stay true surprisingly well, the hub technology is well proven and while the price tag might make you see red, you could easily spend almost twice this much on a set of carbon hoops that aren’t any lighter or appreciably “better” in any concrete way.

The Web Monkey Speaks: Bikes are simple

09.01.2014 //

My gasoline orgy reminded me of why I love bikes so much. In a way, bikes are everything cars are not. Sure, both are modes of transportation, but bikes are simple and just how wonderful that fact is cannot be overstated. With bikes, there are no puking carburetors, no slipping clutches, no faulty oxygen sensors, no ominous grinding noises in your differential… Simple is beautiful.

Tested: Chromag Squarewave Grips

08.22.2014 //

I almost never think about grips. Let’s face it, if they don’t slip and they offer decent traction for your mitts, you’re pretty much golden. The bar is kinda low in this product category. But then I started using Chromag’s Squarewave grips and, I have to admit, they made me realize that most of my other grips aren’t cutting the mustard.

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